How Do I Figure Out What I Want?

So, what do you really want?

As a lightworker or conscious entrepreneur you may be inundated with a million brilliant ideas. You may be super passionate about this one… and then that one… and then that one. You may feel pulled in many different directions, each one of them feeling like they end in a perfectly viable destination.

It can be difficult to know what you really want, or trust which vision is real. Maybe you don’t even doubt that you can manifest your dream reality. Rather, you may not be sure what it is you wish to manifest.

Knowing what you truly want can be tricky because there are a lot of other factors that get in the way. Voices in our head that echo the words of our parents, friends, and social structures. These voices that tell us what we should want, and we can sometimes forget that they aren’t our own. There are deep fears that tell us what we can’t possibly have, and voices of our shattered esteem that tell us what we may not deserve.

All of this can cloud our inner wisdom, that place within us that is steady, that contains a deep knowing. In reality, it’s not that we don’t know what we want, but rather that our inner voice has been covered by countless fogs.


So how do we sift through all of the layers of thoughts, should’s, cant’s and wants to uncover our true intentions?


Uncovering Inner Wisdom

Through my experiences, I have found that there are a number of key ways that we can hear our clearest intention, and I will share those with you now.


Quiet the mind

We can’t help but believe in all those layers of thoughts. But, if we’re going to hear the subtle voice of our inner wisdom, then we have to still the mind. We have to quiet the mental chatter long enough to find gaps between our thoughts. Those gaps are where nonverbal knowledge can arise: That wordless inner knowing that will show you exactly what you want.


This means we need to create times to sit still, to meditate, to be embodied, and to be present. Walks, yoga, meditation and being in nature are great ways to do this.


Heal the Inner Child

Inside all of us are fears and doubts about what we can or can’t have in life. These are all protective mechanisms that arose when we were hurt or afraid children before we had the ability to contemplate, consider and process. We may have many subconscious stories from our childhood about our worth, whether we are powerful, financially abundant, respected, or important.


Your inner wisdom may want something that your child mind doesn’t believe is possible, and when this happens confusion will arise. To heal confusion you must become aware of the subconscious stories you have, through inner child work. 


Squish logical objections

Logic is wonderful and we need it to function in the world. But when it comes to big dreams, logic often falls short. This is because logic can’t ever place together what it doesn’t know, and there is no way for a mind to know the future. Your dream doesn’t care about how it will logically get there, it just knows it will.


This doesn’t mean you won’t plan, (as you’ll see in my post about taking action, its imperative to turn visions into action through planning), it just means your logical mind will hardly ever agree with a beautiful big dream. So, let all the logical fear-based objections arise, give them thoughtful attention, and then squish the ones that you know just don’t have the foresight.


Brainstorm, dream-write, or coach it out

Sometimes, you can get stuck in the logical mind, and when this happens, meditation alone may not work. There are other practical tools to uncovering your subconscious that I’d like to share with you.


Brainstorming: grab out a fun colorful pen and a stack of scrap paper. Write out all the things you’ve ever wanted to do, all of your ideas, all of your plans. Really, write everything. Then, after you’ve given it some space (a few hours or a day) come back and circle the ones that stand out at you. Then, write out why they will work, how you see them working, and most importantly why you want them to work.


Dream-writing: if brainstorming was still too “heady” and logical, then dream writing will work a treat. Grab a nice pen, a stack of paper and set a timer for five minutes. Write down the following question: “What do I really want and why?”. Then, push start on the timer and begin to write. The key to dream-writing is to never stop, not even for a second. If your mind draws a blank, keep writing the question out until something else arises. This process bypasses your logical mind and accesses your subconscious. You can use the results you got from brainstorming to create new questions. For example, “How would starting my own coaching business fulfil me?”, or “Why do I want to write my book?”


Coaching: Sometimes, we need to get out of our own minds completely. The support of an objective third party can be vital. Coaches are trained to bring us to a place of clarity, to ask us the very questions that uncover what we truly want, and then hold us accountable to get there. If you’re stuck in a loop of not-knowing, this can be the way to get you out.


The point is getting clear on what you want is the key to manifesting your perfect reality. Without a clear vision, you’re likely to go around in circles and waste your precious energy stuck in confusion and uncertainty about what you don’t want and getting quiet and understanding exactly what you want, and why, is the most powerful weapon you could ever wield.


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